Stars in Her Eyes

We’ve all had that television show in our lives where we’re just not that into the main character pairing. We know we’re supposed to feel something for this couple, and it’s just not there. Or, maybe we like them well enough, but we’re not overly invested in whether or not the two remain a pair. We’d be perfectly fine with them going their separate ways. At one point, I’d completely accepted Booth and Brennan would be nothing more than friends on Bones, and was rather content with the assumption. Why? I was incredibly invested in Hodgins and Angela. Not that worried about Ross and Rachel’s back-and-forth, will they/won’t they on Friends? Chandler and Monica are there for the shipping. Honestly don’t care who Ted from How I Met Your Mother ends up with at this point? Well, even the BroTP fans are getting a bit disillusioned, but I think I’ve made my point.

Let’s get into the key steps for Secondary Shipping.

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No, I’m not playing Clue. I’m talking about a singularly fantastic scene that was cut from the original theatrical release ofSuperman II.It never sat right with me, how Lois discovered Clark Kent’s true identity. I’d grown up with Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman. Lois was spit-fire and strong. She was determined and searched for the truth, and within two seasons she’d nailed down the similarities between Clark Kent and Superman that a tight costume and loose fitting suit with glasses couldn’t completely conceal. She inspired me, and I found myself ever thrilled by the strong woman that was Lois Lane. Then, I went back and rewatched the Superman movies starring Christopher Reeves (just the first two) and found myself injured by the way Lois discovered Clark’s identity. It was so terribly convenient. His hand fell in the fire and wasn’t burned. That is Lois’ great triumph of discovery? How tragic. Then, we rented the Richard Donner cut of Superman II, and I was overjoyed; finally, something that made sense.

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When I was about 11-years-old, I started going to my Grandmother’s for a month in the Summer. By the time I was 13, that changed to a month at my Father’s house, which turned out to be a much more enjoyable time since my father didn’t hide my hole-y jeans and insist on me wearing dresses and staying out of the trees. But while I was at my Grandmother’s (Mima’s), I found many ways to entertain myself. She had pieces of carpet on top of the carpet throughout the main portion of the house. Yes, you read that right. Carpet pieces on top of carpet. I would hop from one to the other avoiding imaginary lava. I would crawl into the fig tree victoriously, and I would evade villains while being a top-notch spy by hopping over the fence. A spy doesn’t have time to open the gate! And just a few weeks ago, I unknowingly took my last hop over that fence.

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Walking down the hall I clutched the side of my dress as passerbys wished me a happy weekend. I hoped they wouldn’t spot the long, gaping opening from my armpit to my hip. The zipper on my dress had popped, and try as I might, I couldn’t get it back down. I closed my office door and hopped on the internet, desperate for a solution, when I came across an article suggesting the use of a lubricant like lotion for the zipper. I opened my bag and produced my Oil of Olay and set to work on that zipper.

It took about ten minutes, but I succeeded in righting the wrong, and walked out of my office to a meeting without anyone being the wiser. I wonder if any of those passerbys in the hall noted the situation, or the odd way I was gripping my dress. It’s possible they did, but I’m grateful they said nothing. And right now I’m really, really grateful for Oil of Olay.

It’s been over a week and a half since the episode that stopped the beating hearts of the fandom aired, and while I enthusiastically watched with the rest of the shippers in collective freak-out, I’ve hesitated on posting my thoughts about the fourth season finale of my favorite show. Why? I thought if I posted them I might be stoned. Please, don’t hate me. I know some of you already do. I enjoyed the finale, but it feels like  Pirates of the Caribbean 2  to me-like half a movie.

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Ordinarily I’d watch the chaos from afar without comment, but I feel the need to add my voice to the masses; keep calm, loves. It’ll be here soon enough.

Frankly, the marketing for this finale has been superbly executed. For ages we’ve speculated over the Blind Item by a certain Spoiler King whose name I will not mention even for the SEO. We’ve gossiped and guessed and supposed what might/could/should happen. Then, we’re delivered a finale promo Monday night with Kate Beckett, the woman with the seemingly immovable wall, reaching for the man she loves. But, no! He’s leaning away! What could it mean!?

*Cue Fangirl Freak Out*

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It drives me a little nuts, the overuse of the term “love triangle.” In most cases, it is entirely inaccurate pertaining to the couples in question. There are some cases where I can see it applying, as in the case of The Vampire Diaries. Stefan and Damon have a brotherly love, connecting their sides of the triangle, because their love for one another clouds things, but then they both love Elena, and she loves both of them. That, my friends is a triangle. But what most shows have is a Love V. It’s not a triangle. It’s a V. Allow me to explain.

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Admittedly, I started the series gung-ho on the Stelena (gag me for actually writing that cheesy ship name) after reading the original series of books. Damon of the book had been incredibly one-dimensional to me, and I’d much preffered her actual romance with Stefan to the pining, manipulating drama of Damon. However, the series versions of these characters are completely different, and while I enjoyed the Stefan/Elena dynamic, it was always incredibly “safe.” There was drama, sure, but it mostly stemmed from his vampire roots and personal shame, not from any relationship dilemmas or confusion that propelled them both towards being better people. Instead, it was a comfortable relationship between two people who cared about one another, and Stefan tried to prevent anything from ever happening to Elena. But, by doing that, he also enabled her in a world filled with supernatural predators eager to manhandle the doppleganger. Then, this season changed the dynamics. At season’s end, Stefan sacrificed himself to save his brother, a trade-off loop in which the two seem locked. This freed Damon up to be the hero, to be the one for Elena to lean on, and while things didn’t go exactly according to plan, they pushed each other towards newer, better versions of themselves. And I, for one, don’t want to see her regress into the comfort of her relationship with Stefan. Before you throw rocks, I’m not sure Damon should be her endgame either, but for the time being, I think she’s outgrown that steady place in which she used to hide so easily.

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A life lesson from 2001’s Kate & Leopold. No, I’m not kidding. It occurred to me as I watched the movie last week, that when Kate entertains Leopold’s rant about the toaster, she’s evaluating it from the point of view that he is exactly like her ex-boyfriend, Stuart. It’s an unfair assumption of a man she barely knows, but one that many of us are guilty of making. Here’s a grown man with twelve pieces of blackened toast, ranting as the smoke alarm screeches at high decible in protest. The dog’s barking wildly, and all he can do is rant about the audacity of the toaster to produce burnt bread. But, she’s missing the whole picture. You see, Leopold isn’t one of those men who complains about the sky falling and then does nothing to impede its imminent descent. No, he’s a little different, and it helped me pick out one of my pet peeves in this world; people who are all talk.

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